BBW/BHM pet peeves

[sheevaa]

Quote: When people say "Where do you find these cute clothes?"

I tell them George Plus, at Walmart...because George damn well knows that fat women love clothes too, and we don't want to settle for sweats, dangit. I also shop at Addition-Elle (not sure if that's strictly canadian or not, sorry), but those guys can be pretty pricey. The George line is much better for day to day wear.
A lot of clothing companies are missing out on some major cash by not catering to BBW's, that's for sure.

I realised my last post sounded really bitter, I'm not like that, really . My feelings were just hurt...yes, by 9 year olds, lol.

[jen942001 (deleted)]

I have been overweight all of my life...and my gripes about living my life as a plus size girl is as follows:

My thin mother has always thought that I was beneath her because I was overweight. Once a guy flirted with me and not her..and she was crushed.

Compliments from men normally embody..my pretty eyes, pretty face, or my big b--bs.

Men that say they are into big girls and that they want a relationship but when it comes right down to it..they just want to get laid. Honesty up front would help in these situations.

Men that think that because I am a big girl then I am willing to put up with things that the skinny girls will not...like lying, cheating, checking out other girls, and being used.

Men that think that I have low self-esteem just because I am a big girl. I have been this way all my life...so I had to suck it up a long time ago..and accept it. I have a very confident adult.

Going to a club and no one talks to me because if they possibly make eye contact with me..then obviously I am going to fall madly deeply in love. HAHAHA NOT!

People assuming that I date black guys just because I am a plus size white girl. And even worse....people askin me this.

Skinny people that are so short sited to think that a plus size person doesn't have anything to offer...when most of the time, they have more to offer...I am talking about work.

The BIGGEST pet peev....because of society, I feel I will need to change myself in order to have a happy future.

WTF!

[kyborniabred]

`Wow... I never realized all of this but it's so true!!
When I go to the movie theater I always sit with my arms crossed so I don't get into other peoples space,
Fashion Bug kinda has cute clothes for us large lovely laides and so does CATO. I live in Iowa... it's like the chubby lady capital of the country (maybe it just seems that way) so I never feel TOO uncomfortable in the store with little kids. They see fat people all the time I guess so it's nothin.
I've been lucky cause my hospital has gowns that are HUGE on me... and I'm nicely sized. I think hospitals will get to where they're accomodating. (until then just don't get sick. )

AND... I hate the catalog model thing too. Did you know a "plus-size" model is a size 10?!?!?!?!!?!?! My thigh wouldn't fit a size 10! EAT SOME GOOD HOME COOKIN'! yeah... that's all. i totally sympathize with all things posted here... but I still love my big -----!

[twistedlilpixie]

Yes I have to agree with many of these pet peeve's.
I know all about the hospital gown's. I was recently in the hospital for surgery. It covered most of me, but my bum was constantly hanging out. I didn't care though. I figured they wanted to not give me two gowns or be very helpful, then they can stare at my cellulite and dimple covered bum while I walked around my room, lol.

Also yes the clothes they make for us "large" people suck. They're always to small in the wrong parts, or too large in the wrong parts. Like they think just because we're larger that we're just a round ball with long arms and legs. Also it makes me so angry to see all these cool or sexy clothes made for "skinny" o r" normal" sized people, yet its so hard to find sexy or really cool clothes for bigger people. Also most of you ladies must know how irritating it is to see all these super cute and sexy bra's, but they usually never go any bigger than a high B or low C. We get stuck with the bland or ugly ones. Some are ok. Then of course unwires help with our larger bosoms, to boost those bad boys up, but then they dig into your chest or up under your arms. At least for me. Even with those damn bra extenders.

MY biggest pet peeve though, and the one I've run into the most, is that old ignorant stereotype that people that are "fat" eat way too much and are lazy. I barely eat anything. I was very active before I injured myself and became disabled for 2 years. I was still "fat" then. I am losing weight now because I barely eat ( but not intentionally starving myself to get thin, just stress and other factors) and am moving around again much better since my surgery. However I'm so sick of people treating "fat" people like we're some kind of side show attraction. There's a lot of us. They need to get over it. What really gets my goat though is they say that so many americans are overweight and obese, yet I go to all these different places ( bookstores, adult shops, grocery stores, even fast food joints) and most of the time all I see is these thin, pretty girls. Now I'm not saying you can't be pretty because you're big ( obviously we know that, because some of us are super smexy ) and I'll admit yeah I kind of envy them. However as I am getting older, I'm getting more comfortable in my own body and accepting that I'll never have a flat stomach, or long slender arms and legs and all that jazz. Even if I lose another 20 or 30 lbs, I'll never be thin or petite, because thats not my bone structure. However I don't think there's anything wrong with the way I look. Yes I'd like to lose some more weight, but thats more now for health reasons rather than "looking good". ( sorry if I don't make sense and for the rambling)

[sheevaa]

`Aww pixie, you ARE super smexy:-D I have become more comfortable with my body as I've gotten older as well. I just don't care. No one in the service industry is going to browbeat me into feeling ashamed (although my doc is good for it, hehe). If have money, and if I'm going to be treated shabbily, I'll just go spend it somewhere that would rather have it, and treat me like a valued customer. Not a fat person. and to find a BBW lover, all you have to do is look a little harder. I love my life, and no one is going to make me feel bad for that, no matter what my weight is. I love this forum, it makes me feel great. You guys are just awesome!

[nataliemuse]

`I hate that I can't ever find young white guys that like bigger chicks :(

[love2plzu]

`Hi I've read some of yalls peeves and I agree that they are bad. Personally I've dated larger women all my life. I like to snuggle and I like a woman who appreciates my cooking. I've seen a sports il----rated swimsuit addition once and put it down. I can't stand seeing all those ribs its gross. I wish people in this world were more accepting of everything weight included.

[luvyoyo (deleted)]

averagebiggirl wrote: My biggest pet peev is ...Not being able to find anything in my size. I'm 5'11, 264lbs, and I wear a size 11 or 12 in shoes...(depends on the style of the shoe) It's so hard to find something to fit me. Jeans for us big girls are always so old fashioned looking. They never seem to make anything stylish in my size. I can never find the cute stylish shoes in my size...I can only find the boring clogs...lol.

Here for a good time....not for a long time.

im the saaaaaaame way! pant legs, shirt lenghts and sleeve lengths are always way tooooo short! and shoes??? dont get me started!!! im really tall and fat with big feet appearantly.

everyones response are sooo true, but i think my biggest pet peev is the clothes. sure, i like to smell like flowers, but i really hate to walk around LOOKING like a garden! i dont mean any disrespect to anyone, but most clothes for my size are made for older women! im 23 and i have found a couple of shirts of mine that are LIKE my grandmothers! and she isnt fat. she says she likes my style. i love her, but i dont want to dress like her. but it is ok if she wants to dress like me! i dont mind.

its expensive to be fat...

a few of my skinny friends will tell me... "awww, your not fat!" i know they mean well, but seriously, if your 20 pounds overweight, then you are morbidly obese! honey, im over 20 pounds.

having family and friends say, "your so pretty, why dont you have a boyfriend?" heh.....

true story... there was the big black woman wearing black sweats and this kid went up to her and said "wow! your big AND black!" everyone that heard it was shocked and the mother was going to hyperventilate. the woman just looked down at him. he went on and said "and your beautiful." and hugged her. kids can say the darndest things..

[rocknroller]

nataliemuse wrote: `I hate that I can't ever find young white guys that like bigger chicks



Where I'm at, I see BBWs with guys all the time. I've seen some huge ladies with these short or skinny men regularly, in fact. It's much harder for big guys. If anything it's because guys are usually expected to make the first moves, but big guys often have low self confidence. It's even worse if you are a short BHM. Most girls who like BHMs, as few of them as there are, usually prefer taller BHMs. I'm 5'6" and 365lbs. I got a lot of female friends, though lol!
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As far as pet peeves, most of mine have been covered.

Seating in public: check
Finding suitable clothing without going broken in a big and tall store: check
(by the way f@#% Walmart. I can find shirts there, but if you need a waist size over 40 inches, forget it. I worked at a Walmart for about a year and was able to order work pants from the company, but couldn't find a single pair of pants in the store to save my life.)

Never had to wear a hospital gown, but most scales cannot weigh me. If it wasn't for the digital scale at Weight Watchers, I'd have no clue about my weight.

[tailswish (deleted)]

`I've seen a lot I agree with here. Even guys my size have a hard time finding nice clothes, so it isn't limited to just the women's clothing designers. Even online, again and again, the sizes stop at XXL, or XL. It feels like punishment, you know? 'You can re-earn the right to wear this cool shirt if you lose 50 pounds.'

I'm very surprised no one's mentioned car seatbelts. I guess we can't complain much about the three decade-old cars made when folks tended to be thinner, but even a late model Ford Focus has very uncomfortable seat belts.

This one's a bit more specific and embarrassing, but who here has encountered those new 'ergonomic' toilet seats? They may conform to a 150 lb person's butt and have some sort of nebulous benefit, but they're purely annoying to anyone larger.

[gaminggeek]

`Mine would be that even though there are places around here like Fashion Bug and The Avenue, the really cutesie bigger clothing is not made for some of us women who have wider shoulders. It might look cute on the rack, but trust me, it doesn't when the cuffs are halfway up my arm because I'm built like a linebacker.

And yes..kids, school, seats, etc etc. It all sucks. What also annoys me is when I do go in for a physical and the doctor is shocked and amazed that my blood pressure, sugar, blood work and all that is normal. *gasp* You mean I can be heavy AND healthy? Say it ain't so.

[easilyamusedor (deleted)]

`my pet peeve is that I can't find a man because I'm a bbw, the dating sites that are for us, have very few men and many more women unlike the regular dating sites.

Men not wanting to be seen with a large woman.

Dating men who have rude family members who say things, wich he will repeat. Just so I know how lucky I am that he puts up with my fatt azz, all these people tell him this and yet, he is still with me. Awwwwwwwwwe let me bend down and kiss the ground you walk on...JERK!

Men who prod me to excersize or try to lose weight "for my health" as they assure me that they love me "just the way I am" ...someone hand me my waders please? The S*** is getting deep!

And forget about men accepting of large women in the state of Oregon. I am NOT looking forward to spending the rest of my life alone, that's my biggest peeve of all. But because of my size, that's what is going to happen from the look of things.

And I'm sorry, but someone here said something about liking bbw's because he enjoys cooking for someone who appreciates it????? WTF??? News flash!!! Not all large people are that way because they just LOoooooooooooooove to eat food all the time in copius amounts, there are other factors. That is stereotypical and a generalization and I take offense at that.

[nataliemuse]

twistedlilpixie wrote:

MY biggest pet peeve though, and the one I've run into the most, is that old ignorant stereotype that people that are "fat" eat way too much and are lazy.



What I have never understood is....who gives a ----? I mean seriously, I could care less if someone did sit on the couch all day, everyday...Why should anyone care what someone else does? Why should I care what anyone eats for that matter....Whether someone sits home all day or runs 5 miles, I'm not affected, impressed, or concerned...It's not my business

[gathickchic78]

`Many Many Many of you have made some extremely valid points and there are stores like Cato, Fashion bug, Torrid, and Lane Bryant where we can get clothes to compliment our bodies. My pet peeves is not with the ignorance of a young child who doesn't know any better because they werent taught any better. My pet peeve is the fact that the prejudice of fat people is often ignored or unheard yes I am short, fat and black but none of that sticks out more than me being fat. Fortunately I am not teased or told I have a pretty face because I attract attention and I am a very outgoing person. Its just being fat stops us from getting alot of breaks in society whether it be job related or whatever I believe it affects everything and that pisses me OFF!

[megspeedy]

bigbootieluvr wrote: My biggest pet peeve is I cant find a BBW that's not spoken for or living a million miles away I am moving near Columbus OH maybe my luck will improve I here about BBw parties all the time but never near me PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! help I will treat a BBW like the goddess she is if one will let me

brian the big bootie lover


I used to live about 40 mins away from Columbus but I moved to Alabama haha sorry

I hate not being able to find my size in a department store. I totally agree with the people that say the bigger sizes are all old fashion. It's crazy, you would think they would make more fashionable sizes for bigger people.

haha I try to use the "fat excuse" to get shotgun but it never works haha

Another thing I hate is when your on a bus and your walking down the isle, you have to angle your hips to walk. HATE THAT!!