Why do people join dating sites when there not looking....

[terrybogard23]

for true love? it's been so many times i have seen women hesitate to get involved with me,why join a dating site if you don't want to date someone?it dosen't make any sense. maybe it's just me or something.but if women don't want to date online,they shouldn't put themselves out there online,maybe it's just me there not into,still not too sure.LOL but when i show interest in them and i tell them that,they act all cautious like they don't want to get involved well,don't join a dating site then if that's the case. that's like me saying "i don't want to work out,but i'll just go hang-out at the gym".

[89shifty (deleted)]

`People join dating sites just for fun. You joined this site to jump into a relationship that you may not want to be in, then you'll be wishing you joined just to mingle around a bit.

Maybe they hesitate because you're not their type or maybe you came on a little too strong or whatever. Just pace yourself, dude. It's not the end of the online dating world.

[daydreamer86 (deleted)]

I think some women join bbw dating sites not to date but find a place where they are comfortable to be themselves and hey they might find someone while they're at it.

[sheevaa]

`On a site like this, it's difficult because it's a smaller section of the dating pool. Myself, for instance. There's so few men on in my area it's silly for me to use this site for dating. I love the forum here, though. I can discuss weight related things without it turning into a fat/skinny bashing debate.

Like daydreamer said, this is a comfortable place. You might have better luck though. Got my fingers crossed for you!

[terrybogard23]

that's the thing,i have been pacing myself,and still no luck.i have been to bigger dating sites and the same thing.there are some sites where people know EXACTLY what there getting thereselfs into though,and there sole purpose for joining those sites ARE for dating,so they know what's up.and there have been times where me and a girl vibe and we plan to meet then POOF! she vanishes.lol well,i guess i'll just take it as it comes or whatever.but i see what you guys are saying and you all make good points,but im talking about the people who say there SERIOUS about dating in there profile,but they don't act like it.

[dramaqueen (deleted)]

`Not everyone on here is looking for a relationship. Some people are here just to meet new people, make friends or discuss issues they might have. Don't take it too seriously if a woman you chat with doesn't want to move in with and marry you straight away. Patience is a virtue.

[jillieebean]

`My personal position.. is Yes I joined to meet someone special but I am leary to jump into anything. the few times that I did decid to take a chance.. the guy was showing alot of interest then we went out and had a nice time.. and he seemed really interested then i got comfortable and let things go to the next level and then he stopped showing interest... and when I asked.. what i got was.. " oh no I didnt just want a one night stand." but still no calls and no interest.. so NOW hell no I am not interested in jumping into somethign with anyone fast.. I want to know someone through talking and feel comfortable .. before I let my guard down again.. and get treated that way.. Its not very nice and it hurts..

PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE....

[fatuglyguy (deleted)]

`Maybe I'm the one whoes out of touch with life. I didn't realize till I was reading a bunch of these forms that they were posted years back. are even some of these people still members and how can I find a friend. I know a lot of people read my name and jump to conclusions but hay it's just a name I ran out of other choices, this one wasn't in use so I grabbed it. yes I'm FAT, ok the truth is out... Yes I think I'm ugly , but hey I'm not the one who loves looks over the truth. Yes I'm a guy, darn three strikes against me right off. but I thought this site was for honest people, not fakers. Was I wrong? As for love haven't found the real thing yet but I'll let you know if I do.

[cookinbubbles]

`I was around when Terrybogard23 first started posting. He sounded like a nice guy but in a hurry for some reason. That is generally unusual as mostly men seem more slow in a relationship. Maybe Terry was suddenly feeling like he ought to have a wife and kids soon or some darn thing.
I don't think your name is odd but it IS bold.
There are good people and bad people on here, just like everywhere in real life. I like to say that @ssh*les come in all colors, sizes, genders and shapes.

[southernfinery]

`fatuglyguy I read your profile and you say your bi-sexual.That is your perference but as for me I don't want to waste time thinking or hoping to get a solid relationship going with a man that isn't sure which way he wants to blow on any particular day.I can deal with competition from women and will to a certain point but how do I compete with a guy for your affection?My life has enough drama in it already without me adding confusion to my daily diet.I wish you luck but in reality wouldn't your needs and desires be dealt with on a site that conforms to your way of life?As a matter of fact I thought there were some bi-sexual sites on passions.Good luck in your search and may God bless you.........P.s I put on my profile that I was off the markey-not looking because I'm not looking anymore.I mean I'm not seeing anyone either but I'm also not looking.If love finds me then it will be doing the looking lol.I need to focus on a few other things and move forward just a bit.gbu all

[obsequium (deleted)]

`You know, I bite my tongue so very, very often I'm surprised it hasn't fallen off.


I can tolerate idiocy, but homophobia.. whether it be latent (as in this case) or overt is totally unacceptable. It makes me sick, honestly.

@Southernfinery

"I read your profile and you say your bi-sexual.That is your perference but as for me I don't want to waste time thinking or hoping to get a solid relationship going with a man that isn't sure which way he wants to blow on any particular day."

The obscenely ignorant assumption that bisexuality equates to confusion, fence sitting or "not being sure which way you want to blow" is ridiculous and downright insulting. Let me explain human attraction in the simplest terms possible. Boys like girls.. sometimes boys like boys, and girls like girls.. and sometimes, boys and girls like both sexes! There is no confusion!

"I wish you luck but in reality wouldn't your needs and desires be dealt with on a site that conforms to your way of life? As a matter of fact I thought there were some bi-sexual sites on passions."

This is the part that really got me. How the hell do you justify this, really? Do you understand how utterly insulting this is? Bisexuality isn't a "way of life" it's an orientation. It's a part of you, but nowhere near a whole of you. I'm sure there is bisexual sites, and I don't think there's a problem in joining them as well, but how dare you imply that someone would be "better suited elsewhere" based on their s----lity? How would you like it if you joined a 'normal' dating site and were told you would be "better suited elsewhere" because you're fat? It's highly offensive.

I find it troubling that people with this mindset still exist. If you're not attracted to bisexual men or women - fine, that's YOUR choice. But do not have the audacity to think everyone shares your vulgar, narrow minded views.

I apologise in advance for this post coming across as rude, because I don't like getting in catfights, but it seems unavoidable with you, southernfinery, because no matter how I try and reason with you, you resort to ad hominem attacks. I will admit, I have been a little unnecessarily forceful in this post, but I am so frustrated and completely sick to death of closet homophobes. I am a firm believer in people being allowed to live their lives the way they want or need to, providing they aren't hurting anyone, free from criticism and prejudice. I really think you need to take a good, long look at yourself, lady. You're a fair bit older than me, and I'm sure you have more life experience. Immature as I may present myself on occasion, I at least try to approach conflict with a modicum of poise, dignity and maturity. I may not always act in the most mature way, but hey, I'm human and I make mistakes, but at least I /try/.

tl;dr Grow up!

[southernfinery]

`^^^^^^^^^^^^@obsequiem all I can say is yawn.Your being irrational and extremely immature.If you are bi then say it and don't pretend that your standing up for a just cause because your not.Your only standing up to be noticed and the justice has gone out the window.Yes I am a few,very few, years older then you,so what?Let's grow up together shall we?If you don't agree with my posts then say so but do it in a more relaxed way ok.If you can't tolerate someone like me then don't say anything to me ok,simple right?You see I am a firm believer in freedom of voice whether my voice says that I believe that being bi-sexual is part of having a split personality and that it is mental health gone awry.You see that is my opinion and it belongs to me lock,stock,and barrel.Going to the admin with a crying game won't make me change my mind nor quiet my opinion.This is a free site and so is my opinion,free that is.

[southernfinery]

`also let me add that calling someone a name like homophobia only lends to showing your mental instability.You can't holler foul or make them be quiet if they don;t agree with you but you can say that you disagree with them and you can even say why.I addressed fatuglyguy about something that fatuglyguy said as in he wasn't meeting to many folks.It stands to reason that the reason I gave him could be considered a legit one right?So it wasn't necessary for you to attack me yet again now was it?You remember the topic I posted in the dieting forum?You added a comment and I didn't attack you now did I?My mama told me a long time ago that if you don't have anything nice to say then come stand by me lol ok no she didn't.She said don't say anything at all.You are so busy trying to make me out to be the irrational one that your neglecting to cover your own irrationality.In all your getting get understanding.

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[ladyrusty]

`They really are looking ... otherwise, they'd go to satellite radio.