Sex on the first date

[princessofpink]

How do you feel about --- on the first date? If you did it, would you regret it later? If you have --- on the first date, do you think you improve or hurt your chances of having a second date?

[shannon51]

Depends on what you want, if you are just looking for casual sex, I don't see a problem as long as you use good sense and protection. If you are looking to build a relationship I think it puts up lots of road blocks and makes it much easier to end up wondering why you are with someone you don't know/don't like/WTF??? kind of thing. The real reason not to have --- right off the bat, is so you can get to know each other without so many pressures to stay with someone you might find you don't like all that much after you get to know them. --- muddies the waters and your head, there is a chemical reaction often times that makes a person want to be with someone they are having --- with, it can cloud one's better judgment. Something great is worth waiting for and building a strong foundation under. And no I'm not some prude spouting abstinence LOL I'm talking from experience. :wink

[princessofpink]

I agree. It can be hard to get to know the little things about someone that help build a relationship once you've already been intimate.


shannon51 wrote: If you are looking to build a relationship I think it puts up lots of road blocks and makes it much easier to end up wondering why you are with someone you don't know/don't like/WTF??? kind of thing.

[2rainbow (deleted)]

I will confess; Lee and I actually slept together on our first official date. By that time, however, I knew that this man was special--and over a year later, he still is!
I see nothing wrong with --- on the first date, if you're adult enough to know that that is exactly what it is: --- on a first date. It isn't instant love, a commitment, an engagement, or 'going steady'--it's ---.

[honee_PREV (deleted)]

[quote="princessofpink"]I agree. It can be hard to get to know the little things about someone that help build a relationship once you've already been intimate.


shannon51 wrote: If you are looking to build a relationship I think it puts up lots of road blocks and makes it much easier to end up wondering why you are with someone you don't know/don't like/WTF??? kind of thing.



You ladies have a point.....although I have been with someone that I had --- with on a first date just to "get it out of the way"so to speak....because the ------ tension was so high that we could hardly focus on conversation....yes... the chemistry took over and well...what can I say...that relationdship lasted for a number of months....it was good while it lasted....

Honee

[justpeachyinsc]

I've done it and I think that the problem comes in when you think that --- makes it a relationship.

Sometimes a relationship can occur but thinking that by having --- with someone on a first date means something other than --- is deluding yourself and going to make your personal life a series of imaginary relationships and unnecessary heartaches in the long run.

So I agree with 2rainbows...

[shannon51]

What do you consider a relationship? A few month of --- and some dates out doesn't count as a relationship to me, I think of it as something more formed, thought out, intense...

I do think you can have --- then build a relationship, but I think it makes it harder, of course there are always exceptions, but when someone tells me 20 years down the road that they are happy and in a solid relationship, then I think it didn't matter if they had --- right off, but in other cases (more common) it only lasted a few years or so and it was rocky and on/off again, that there never was much but the ------ element. Of course it only my opinion I know personally there are a lot more men I wish I'd never had --- with than there are those I'm glad I did, and I certainly would not have even wanted to if I'd taken more time to get to know them better before I jumped in with both feet. I spent a lot of time trying to force feed a relationship than I did just dating and enjoying getting to know someone.

[hippyhound (deleted)]

Tough one but I never do and prefer to build on the friendship first before taking it to the bedroom.

[jnighthawk34]

It is always so tempting. But I beleive in the to know me is to love me theory. That way a foundation is built and the cards are on the table.









Remember, You are your first love.

jnighthawk34 (Jeff)

[nightwhispers28]

I've never had --- on the first date and probably never will unless I grow way more bold in personality enough to suggest it to someone I might be interested in.

But further.. for me.. it boils down to my traditional values that i think are becoming obselete in the day and age we are in now. I wanted to believe for so long that there was some sweet man out there that might be willing to date for a long while.. get to know each other and then.. if he and I felt the same, maybe it might happen. I also believed it would happen with a husband but that hasn't happened either. Guess there is no such thing as a born again virgin eh?

But the bottom line is I'm happy with my choice to remain celibate since the opportunity really hasn't come along with someone I'm willing risk getting my heart broken again. As the old saying goes.. twice burned twice shy.

[rockleahy1]

I think --- on a first date can be a very good thing. I think two people can find the chemistry pretty overwhelming, and in such situations, it can be magical to have --- on the first date. I would not regret having --- on a first date, because I don't think I would do that, unless the chemistry was just overpowering, and if it was that overwhelming, then I think --- on a first date would be a very good thing.

I think --- on a first date, under such circumstances, where the chemistry was so powerful, would only improve the odds of both people wanting a second and third and fourth date.

I would say that if the man is not really that into the woman, but just wants sex, and they do wind up having --- on the first date, then he might not want to have a second date. In this case though, where he just wants --- and is not really too crazy about the woman he has just met, he is gonna probably leave her behind, at whatever point they do have sex, whether it is the second or third or fourth date. If --- is all he wants, then he won't stick around for too many dates.

So, for any woman, who is worried that all the guy is after is sex, then she should definitely take her time, and find out for sure, by dating him for quite a while, before having --- with him. If he is truly crazy about her, he will stick around, and only want her more, after they do, finally have ---.

[samandstacy (deleted)]

any one here want to private chat on yahoo im i have a web cam

[funredefined (deleted)]

WHEN I HAD --- ON THE FIRST DATE I DON'T THINK IT AFFECTED ME, I WAS NOT BEING JUDGEMENTAL ABOUT HER. WE HAD IT AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN .... WE MET, TALKED, AND WE MET AND TALKED AND DID IT AGAIN AND AGAIN!!!!!

[thechef (deleted)]

funredefined wrote: WHEN I HAD --- ON THE FIRST DATE I DON'T THINK IT AFFECTED ME, I WAS NOT BEING JUDGEMENTAL ABOUT HER. WE HAD IT AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN .... WE MET, TALKED, AND WE MET AND TALKED AND DID IT AGAIN AND AGAIN!!!!!



By your avatar you appear to be a man of color like the Chef. That would explain your outstanding ------ prowess. The Chef is not only an man of color but he is a colorful man.

The Chef loves the ladies and the ladies love the Chef and more often than not the ladies be wantin to make sweet love with the Chef on the very first date and while the Chef would be more than happy to oblige them and fulfill their womanly passion sometimes the Chef like to make em wait.

Before the Chef was the succesful man he is today the Chef would often accept certain gratuities from the ladies for makin swwt love to them as only the Chef can.

The Chef would advise the gentleman out there to not be jumpin into bed on the first date. If you are able to make sweet love like the Chef does you may that you be needin a retrainin order. SO before you go jumpin into bed with a lady make sure she ain't psycho.

[lonigatienne (deleted)]

i meet most of my dates from being online, etc, and go into them with no plans for a relationship. when it comes to sex, i have no guilt feelings about --- on the first date as long as we both have an understanding about the commitment thing. if --- becomes the basis of the relationship, so be it. i feel each of us has an equal chance to be hurt - or to have a fulfilling relationship.