Dating Guys and Dating Guys who ONLY Date Big Girls

[rarthus (deleted)]

Me I was in a relationship recently that nearly ended even earlier than when it did because my girlfriend at the time wouldn't even consider the idea of putting on a few pounds. I liked/loved her for her but deep down I still wished she'd reconsider. When we eventually did break up, it was because she was intending on going to college and couldn't see herself balancing college and relationships. Class act.

Anyway, I brought that up to move onto this. In a sense, the break up was good because now I can go for The One I'm looking for. The Plump One. I mean, I was gonna stay with her regardless her weight/size but since it's over... See, the thing with me is that I'd love a girl who loves to eat, who's big, fluffy or whatever you wanna call it because you know what that tells me? That they're okay with they're body! Yeah and, finding them physically attractive probably has something to do with it too but regardless, women who accept their size and embrace it is a huge turn on to me. Because that brings confidence and makes them strong willed. And hot to boot.

[loverboywk]

`Dating only larger ladies? Well, not quite, but there's several reasons why they're certainly preferred in my book. I've been around the petite, the thin, the healthy, and the big. In no way has size ever played a part in who was attractive, but it certainly seemed to alter the way I could view her as more than just a companion, but my friend AND lover.

As a guy who's dated mostly pleasingly plump pin-ups, though, I gotta say the main reason why isn't just because of the amount of curves (of which 1,000 graces be given) or the generally relaxed air that's possible between a man's man and a healthy woman; it is simply because generally a good woman who isn't scared of her size isn't scared of anything else and can relax. No worrying over every detail of her life, her plate, or her body; just being able to enjoy herself and allowing me to enjoy her as well.

In other words, you ladies seem to be more self-sufficient and socially less awkward / expectant. And that relaxation is worth 1,000,000X more than anything Victoria's Secret could produce.

[maya86]

`I'm not really sure about dating guys who'd only date big girls. I mean yes, I'm 6'0, 280pounds and that would qualify me as a big girl but as great as it might sound, I also know its not healthy (I'm a doctor- I gotta walk the talk). What I'm trying to say is this- if I were to date a guy that dates big girls exclusively, when I do loose weight (which I really wanna do btw), he wouldn't be attracted to me anymore and well, the relationship could disintegrate. I'm looking for someone to settle down with- someone who loves me for me.. my personality, the entire shabang.. someone who would love me despite my weight.

- Maya

[lrai (deleted)]

First, I can't stop laughing at everyone saying big girls are "fluffy". I never thought of myself as "fluffy" before but I think it's hilarious and I might start using the term!

I'm seeing a lot of guys who appreciate larger women on here, and I'm certainly grateful that you're out there and liking us! (because it's certainly a rarity) But then I look around my own surroundings and find I am still surrounded by the school mentality. A friend said it went away in college...she unknowingly lied. Such a disappointment.

I did meet one person a while back and he said he liked big girls because of the typical big breasts. I don't have those unfortunately, so I think that I'm a little cautious and that's the first thing that pops into my mind if a guy says he likes larger women. Thoughts?

[ssbbwloverinnv (deleted)]

` I've heard the term "fluffy' before to describe a large-sized person, but to me it sounds more like something you would name your cat. But to each his own. Although big breasts on a big woman is certainly nice, it's not the only thing I see, and don't want to be perceived as shallow--personality, intelligence and compatability are important like in any other relationship besides physical attraction.

[southernfinery]

`ok so here I go again adding two cents worth of opinion......It reads well on paper to say that all of the things that make us the unique individuals that we are today,are indeed important when looking for a mate but(yep you knew it was coming) that hasn't been my experience personally or in observation of others.The one quality that simply stands alone in this day and time is the physical quality.Sorry to say that this is my belief but there it is.Imo as the years go by so does the human quality of the relationship process.I mean we have men leaving their supportive spouses for arm candy and eye candy.The sad fact is that these relationships are very short-lived.It seems that nothing was obtained through pure love from the heart and so nothing has any strength or longivity.I have noticed that in these short-term relationships based on sight value that one could clearly say that when one is out of sight of the other then trust is also.Well I guess it goes like this'how can you trust someone else when you don't trust yourself'.In that way of thinking then I would agree that keeping the arm candy within arms reach at all times would be the wisest approach.Wouldn't it be better to go to a company party knowing that the one you brought is also the one your leaving with and is the same one that will attend all other functions with you.Why is it that when it comes to the political game the family scene is the most appealing and is pushed forth whole-heartedly?I said all that to say this,dating is just that'dating',your not giving a kidney or losing an eye so try to just have some fun while you can.

[toucherpudge (deleted)]

`Dating is only fun when you feel attractive/attracted to the one you're dating!

It's been my experience that both can have drawbacks and perks.

I've experienced that men who are into big women (depending on how truthful they claim to be about seeking a serious relationship) can be a little touchy feely too soon, or they over compliment you in an effort to help usher you into s----l "freeness" quickly. It often does make you comfortable - and even feel like a vixen... until you try to have an actual exchange of ideas with them- they don't really have anything interesting to say but they'd still like to fool around some.

Then I've met men who've told me up front that they never usually date big women, and we have tons to talk about- and they've even complimented how cute my FACE is (as if my head sprouted legs and arms and walks around by itself.) They often feel awkward in bed, they weren't really into exploring and were very mute. I also include men who claim to love big women but have never been with any in this category, because they act the same way (with me at least). LOL

So to answer your question more directly- yes I have and they were nice while they lasted- but I'd like to meet someone that met somewhere in-between the two.

[lunababy]

`My last boyfriend was an FA, and in the beginning it was a dream come true. In order to be myself I have to know I'm not being judged- so se---lly, knowing he preferred my body type as opposed to simply accepting it, I was really able to come alive. It was refreshing to see him ogling big girls instead of supermodels, and I always knew I was sexy to him. Unfortunately, after a few years, he became very controlling- particularly where my size was concerned. I decided I wanted to take up yoga and maybe lose ten or twenty pounds (obviously, this isn't enough weight loss to make me anything resembling a thin chick!) and he hit the roof! He said that if I lost weight, any weight, not only would he stop being attracted to me but I would also be insulting him and his taste!!! He made my size an extension of his ego, which was *not* okay with me. It was pretty much exactly the same as having a partner tell me that if I ever GAINED weight, he'd leave me- no matter how much we loved one another! It was bizarre. Love my fat, of course, but first and foremost- love ME!

[toucherpudge (deleted)]

lunababy wrote: `My last boyfriend was an FA, and in the beginning it was a dream come true. I decided I wanted to take up yoga and maybe lose ten or twenty pounds (obviously, this isn't enough weight loss to make me anything resembling a thin chick!) and he hit the roof! He said that if I lost weight, any weight, not only would he stop being attracted to me but I would also be insulting him and his taste!!! He made my size an extension of his ego, which was *not* okay with me. It was pretty much exactly the same as having a partner tell me that if I ever GAINED weight, he'd leave me- no matter how much we loved one another! It was bizarre. Love my fat, of course, but first and foremost- love ME!

YES!!! But... others could and have argued with me that "First you say you want someone to love your big body, then you want them to just love who you are?! Pick one!"

Can't we have both- just as we can give both?! I swear... You know, one FA boyfriend I had, told me that he thought I was beautiful, funny, smart, and bla bla bla, but was a lawyer. He outright told me that ...before we could get serious and possibly marry-I had to sign a pre-marital agreement stating that I understood I had to maintain the same weight I was when he'd first met me or gain - but never ever lose below that point or we'd divorce!

I know- alternate universe kind of stuff! But he said that crap and I just looked at him in amazement. Needless to say, THAT'S over.

Touch

[3chocobbwkisses]

jrockin82 wrote: I was just wondering if anyone else has had an experience like me...Men that I have dated in the past have dated me because they liked ME, not necessarily because they liked big girls. All of my exes had dated thinner girls in the past. Just recently I started seeing someone who exclusively dates big girls. I have to tell you, it's a TOTALLY different experience!!! I feel so much more comfortable with him! It took me about 2 yrs with my ex to walk around naked in front of him, and with this new guy I'm seeing, I was comfortable the second WEEK I was with him. I was just wondering if any other ladies had similar experiences, or if any guys had anything to say about this

~*Jaime*~

i have never dated a guy who preferred skinny females...every guy i have dated has liked bbw's way b4 they met me, but i could understand how that would make a female feel insecure but jus like u i i would b more comfy datin guys who strictly like bbw's

[tnbecca]

lunababy wrote: `My last boyfriend was an FA, and in the beginning it was a dream come true. In order to be myself I have to know I'm not being judged- so se---lly, knowing he preferred my body type as opposed to simply accepting it, I was really able to come alive. It was refreshing to see him ogling big girls instead of supermodels, and I always knew I was sexy to him. Unfortunately, after a few years, he became very controlling- particularly where my size was concerned. I decided I wanted to take up yoga and maybe lose ten or twenty pounds (obviously, this isn't enough weight loss to make me anything resembling a thin chick!) and he hit the roof! He said that if I lost weight, any weight, not only would he stop being attracted to me but I would also be insulting him and his taste!!! He made my size an extension of his ego, which was *not* okay with me. It was pretty much exactly the same as having a partner tell me that if I ever GAINED weight, he'd leave me- no matter how much we loved one another! It was bizarre. Love my fat, of course, but first and foremost- love ME!



My last bf was the first FA I dated. WOW, loved it. He was the first one that made me feel comfortable about my weight. We would go out to eat TONS and so I did gain weight. He loved it. My Mom got onto me about my weight, so I decided to try to lose...he hated it. He told me I was beautiful and didn't need to lose weight. So, guess what...I didn't, LOL. I got bigger then he dummped me BECAUSE I was too fat...WTF!!!!
Becca

[ssbbwloverinnv (deleted)]

` It's OK, Becca--you're among friends here. :)

[lolli49 (deleted)]

wafflemaker wrote: `^ I love big girls. And only date big girls now exclusively. I used to date barbie but...... As time passed I realized big girls have much better things to offer me. And since most of them haven't been so completely ----ed up, you can repair most of the damage they've gone through. Even if the two of you don't work out, she can leave the relationship with a fresh new take on men.

Big girls are just about the best.

Very nice Wafflemaker! What a healty take for ANY relationship!

[italianfa1 (deleted)]

`I have always dated big women exclusively and I love it. I have always been told by the woman that I have dated that they feel so comfortable with me due to that fact. I LOVE IT. Makes me feel good that I made them feel good.

I hope everyone experiences this more and more!

Hugs,
Alessandro

[vikiz123 (deleted)]

I've never dated anyone who specifically dates BBW ladies, but I'm really interested in doing so. I'm kind of on a mission of self-acceptance and I have come very far so I feel like meeting Mr. Right would be the icing on the cake! :)